so much for a blog.
there are only 5 followers here.. and i don’t think anyone really cares about this blog so we won’t really post here as much unless you guys would actually want us too~
but i don’t really think ray and i are really “feeling” this kinda blog. im really really sorry. D: i’ll probably still write here time to time if i feel like it though~ ray on the other hand, i have no idea. o: anyways, just saying, don’t expect too many posts. ((especially because i barely have a life))
thanks for listening,
sam in da houseeee. again. I have some really weird news.
alrighty, so you all know how i tried to get Eric to break up with me right?
i was giving half assed answers and acting really boring? I thought that my plan didn’t work, because he didn’t seem to mind at all. So I figured I’d have to end things myself, to avoid anyone getting hurt. I don’t like leading someone on.Read more
omg it’s sam again..
you guise must be sick of me~ :>
anyways… guess what? I saw Adam, the stranger, again.
4th time. I don’t even see some of my friends that often in such a short span of time.. i think he’s going to be a regular at my church and stuff.. and i know CHURCH is definitely not the place to pick up guys, but i dont plan on “picking him up”! i always prefer being friends first.
he kept seeing me when i was looking at him, awkward eye contact, it was so weird. i dont think he remembers me tho so.. yeah.
ILL PROBABLY SEE HIM EVERY SUNDAY. omg so he’s not just a stranger i’ll see once and that’s it.
crazy coincidence tho, right? really fucking weiiiiird.
okay sorry, my writing has become less formal.. hope you dont mind?
freaking out over a stranger,
so do you guys remember Adam? The complete stranger I basically fell in love with?
uhm yeah, I saw him AGAIN. 3 times. 3 separate times, in 3 different places. What are the chances? I saw him at church.. A church no one even goes to! There are always seats cuz it’s that empty. Omg okay I freaked out cuz I saw him again.
the fact I keep seeing him makes it so hard to forget him.
oh look, it’s Sam.. AGAIN. How annoying, right? Well whatever, deal with it, bitchhhh.
no wait! I take it back, come back! (~.__.)~
Hmm, so nothing much has been going on with my life. Lately I’ve been thinking about how much I regret some of the stupid crap I did.. Not the stupid crap like “I went out with the wrong guy” I mean the stupid crap like “I was acting really retarded and people think I’m a complete fucktard now, yay”
Hopefully this 2013, I won’t regret so many damn things… Damn you, Past-Sam, someone should’ve punched you in the face. Maybe not punch.. How about a friendly, “hey, fucker! Don’t do that, people don’t understand what you mean and now they think you just stupid!” Alright, there is almost no nice way to say that..
Anyways, so I haven’t seen Eric since last year… I really don’t know what to do, I like him… But I don’t LOVE him like he “loves” me. In all honesty though, I think guys fall in “love” way too easily. I’ll only say I’m in love if I truly mean it, I don’t like lying about theses things.
Oh well, nothing much I can do about it right now.
idk idk idk,
Hey it’s Ray!
sorry i haven’t been posting anything. Not like any ones keeping track. Anyway life is actually turning out well surprisingly, i made up with a few friends and well there is the fact i having a hard time with schooling and my family and the guy i love asked someone else to prom………………. never mind life is still a bitch. Don’t i live up to the name “ray”.
|This is sam. I was messaging Eric to sleep because it was really late and he was tired|
|Me:||Just sleep, ayt?|
|Eric:||I love you :(|
|Me:||*tries to pretend I did not just read that*|
|Eric:||And I know you don't in the same way, but I thought I should say it.|
|Me:||*feels guilty because he's so fucking nice and understanding why don't I love him*|
Hey there, it’s Sam. Again. You guys must be sick of me. :O
Anyways, I just wanted to drop by and say hi! Oh and I also think I was able to figure out why I wasn’t so sure about being with Eric.
I think it’s because, I don’t want Eric to be my first.. anything. I mean, I am a very sentimental person. I don’t wanna look back at something and say my first boyfriend/kiss/etc.. was with someone I wasn’t in love with.. or best friends with first! Eric is so amazing though, I guess it wouldn’t be so bad. I just get weird and have super complicated issues, ayt?
I figures it out because when I thought about it… I would’ve instantly said yes if James ever asked me that. Which was weird for me, so I over thought everything until I came up with a decent theory.
ahahahaha i’m so fucking weird. That’s all for now, folks! bye~
This is Sam! I tend to write here more than Ray because she’s a lazy bum :3
MURRY CHRISTMUS, EVURYBODEHH~
So, i was talking to Eric on Facebook chat, and he said something about how; he wouldn’t see me in awhile so he decided to just ask now.. And he asked me to be his girlfriend.
Of course, knowing me, my first reaction was to ask a question. I asked him what the difference between me being his girlfriend and whatever we were now was, he said it just made things more “official”
I guess that made sense, so I said yes.
I don’t know why, there wasn’t anything wrong with it, but I don’t like how “committed” this all seems.
I do like him. He’s such a damn sweet person, it makes me even feel guilty. I just have awful commitment issues I guess.
ughh i’m so annoying. ahaha i just felt like writing~
thanks for reading, i love you, bye.
im so sorry for this shittily made post, it’s 5 am and i’m not exactly sane right now.
i like pretending i have an audience and feeling obliged to post even if no one cares :3
This is Sam! Hellaw, peeps. (I know there’s no one reading this, but I’d like to pretend.)
So here’s the update on Eric! Who I realized, I haven’t talked about in awhiiiile.
He thinks he loves me. He hasn’t told me himself, but he’s told other people and etc. For me, TRULY loving someone romantically, takes awhile. You need to really know the person and love each and every bit if them. I don’t think he completely knows what he’s talking about!
But apparently, I found out there are like 5 types of love. I believe in the type that is selfless and all that bullshit~ TECHNICALLY THOUGH, technically… If it’s the type that is kind of shallow, then yes. Yes, he loves me.
I know he’s been trying to tell me too. I’ve been avoiding it. At. All. Costs. Everytime he tries to, i act dense and he loses his momentum. I think I actually have commitment issues. Omfg, I’m such a guy… Sometimes.
Anyways, I have nothing really important to talk about, I just thought I should update you guys or something! Thanks for reading, if you read.
I have the mentality of a guy,
Because this shouldn’t be all bad things: Eric is actually really really sweet, shy and awkward :3